Dear Anash, She’yichyu
I would like to mention several Halachos that sometimes are overlooked.
1. Candle lighting Erev Yom Kippur
2. Havdalah Motzei Yom Kippur
3. Giving the Lulov to your child on Yom Tov
1. Candle lighting on Erev Yom Kippur – One should not light the Yom Tov candles in Shul, as it is questionable whether or not one can be Yotze Neiros Yom Tov there. Rather it must be done at home.
It is most proper to be Mekabel Shabbos when you light the candles. In the event you are not able to be Mekabel Shabbos when lighting the candles, (though, one must be Mekabel Shabbos within ten minutes of candle lighting) you should not recite the Shehechiyanu then but rather in Shul together with the Chazan.
Either way, in the event that when you go to shul there is no person over the age of Ben or Bas Mitzva left in your home who will derive enjoyment from the light of the candles; the candles should be sufficiently large that when you come home, they will still be burning and you will be able to derive some pleasure from them.
2. Havdalah Motzei Yom Kippur - The Bracha Borei Meorie Ha’eish must be made on a flame that was burning on Yom Kipper for the purpose of radiating light. Therefore one should light a flame before Yom Kippur for none other than the function of its light. An extra Yahrtzeit lamp may be used for this, so long it’s not being used for a Ner Neshamah.
If this is not possible; you should kindle a candle - before Havdalah - from the already lit Yahrtzeit light and place both the new candle and the Yahrtzeit light next to each other and make the Borie Meorei Haeish on both of them.
3. Regarding the Lulov and Esrog – They must belong to you, both the first and second days. The same Halochos that apply on the first day, regarding children before Ben and Bar Mitzvah age, pertain to them the second day as well. Therefore, just like you cannot hand them over to your child on the first day unless you hold the Lulov and Esrog with him/her, so not to cause the child to become the owner of them, the same pertains to the second day. Only after all the adults have completed Bentching Lulov and Esrog on the second day, may you give it to your child.
Wishing you a G'mar Chasima Tova and a Freilichen Succos.
Rabbi Simcha Werner